CORE STUFF

I cried during yoga today. I know this is a thing that happens, I hear people share about it all the time. But I’m not one of “those” people. I go to yoga twice a week. I’m not good at the practice, I never have been. I’m 6 feet tall with size 11 feet. Bending […]

ELEVEN

LETTER TO MY 11-YEARS-AGO-SELF Jackie, I know you are scared and unsure and kind of hung-over from last night. I know you want to turn around and run back home to the elusive security you search for at the bottom of every bottle. I know your fears are so many they could fill up the […]

GIANT

There once was a little girl who lived in a forest with great word spinning giants. In case you didn’t know, there are many different species of fairy tale giants, and word spinning ones happen to be the rarest and most talented of the bunch. Instead of spending their days smelling the blood of englishmuns […]

Sick In The City

When I first moved to New York City from Southern California, months went by before it occurred to me that I hadn’t even hugged another human in days…63 to be exact. No matter, I thought as I turned up Jay-Z’s “Empire State Of Mind” a little louder in my headphones and walked a little faster […]

unbelievable

Standing next to me in the courtroom, my rapist didn’t look like a rapist at all. It wasn’t just his black dress shirt and tie, or his perfectly creased pants and shiny shoes. It was the warm smile he wore when he walked in and cheerfully greeted everyone in the room that almost completely camouflaged […]

NOW FEAR THIS

I remember my body as it was then, warm and soft and long with a too-round middle that I’m always staring at in the mirror with a critical eye. I feel my body tense sharply at the sound of a man’s voice telling me in the darkness of his bedroom and in the tangle of […]

COMING OUT UNDONE

I was in the hands of a man recently. It started out as my hand in his, a firm handshake as he thanked me for being the main speaker at an AA meeting while looking me in the eye with his kind and gentle gaze. “We should be friends,” he boldly stated. As our hands […]